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The role of the grooms parents |
Wedding Date:________ Ceremony Times:_______ Reception Times:_______
Grand Parents of the Bride:
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1. Bookmark this site for
easy future reference.
2. Select a wedding consultant to help you avoid wasting time
or money.
3. Confirm ceremony date, time, and site with officiant.
4. Set a preliminary budget.
5. Select attendants.
6. Reserve the reception site.
7. Select and book caterers, photographers, videographers, florists,
musicians, and other service providers.
8. Begin compiling guest list.
9. Select wedding dress, headpiece, and bridesmaid's dresses.
10. Start thinking about your honeymoon.
1. Attend premarital classes.
2. Choose and order your dress accessories.
3. Register for china, gifts, etc.
4. Shop for a new home.
1. Place deposits and sign
contracts for wedding services.
2. Choose bridesmaid's dresses and accessories.
3. Choose flower girl's dress.
4. Make sure your visas and passports are up to date, if you're
traveling.
5. Complete honeymoon plans with groom.
6. Discuss rehersal dinner with groom.
1. Verify that the wedding
gown, bridesmaid's dresses, and flower girl dress have been ordered.
2. Make sure addresses for guest list are up to date.
3. Order invitations, announcements, and any other personal stationary.
4. Choose and order formal wear for groom and attendants.
5. Make sure all out-of-town male attendants have submitted their
measurements to your formal wear provider.
6. Verify that both mothers have selected and ordered either dresses.
7. Investigate requirements for medical test and other records
for your marriage license.
8. Design a map to direct guests to the ceremony and reception
sites.
9. Complete registering.
10. Shop for trousseau.
1. Schedule final fitting.
2. Finalize bridal registry.
3. Confirm ceremony details with your officiant.
4. Finish addressing invitations and announcements.
5. Finalize wardrobe for showers, pre-wedding parties, and honeymoon.
6. Shop for gifts for bridal party.
7. Shop for accessories, such as shoes, stockings, garter, purse,
cake knife, candles, and guest registration book.
8. Choose wedding rings, and arrange for engraving.
9. Plan your bridesmaid's party.
10. Schedule and appointment with your hairdresser and make-up
consultant.
11. Finalize and verify all details with service providers.
12. Order wedding cake.
1. Mail invitations.
2. Confirm all male and female attendants have been fitted for
formalwear.
3. Set rehearsal and inform all who needed to be there.
4. Make final menu decisions.
5. Discuss wedding photo shots with photographer and videographer.
6. Send announcement to newspaper.
7. Write thank you notes for gifts.
1. Pick up wedding gown,
and confirm that it fits properly.
2. Take care of blood and medical tests, and marriage license.
3. Finalize musical selections for the ceremony and reception.
4. Finalize seating chart for reception.
5. Finish addressing announcements to mail on wedding day.
1. Pick up wedding rings.
2. Give final guest count for the reception to your caterer.
3. Practice applying make-up for the wedding day, if you're doing
it on your own.
4. Confirm details with all service providers.
5. Verify all bridesmaids and groomsman have picked up their formalwear.
6. Confirm that all attendants know when to arrive at the rehearsal,
rehearsal dinner,and wedding ceremony.
7. Confirm honeymoon plans.
8. Make a list of names and pronunciation for the Best
Man to mention in his introduction, if appropriate.
9. Cancel newspaper, and mail for while you're away.
10. Pay up coming bills that will be due while you are away.
11. Pack for honeymoon and purchase traveler's checks.
12. Arrange to move belongings to new home.
1. Review any special seating
arrangements with ushers.
2. Groom to pick up formalwear.
3. Make sure to have marriage license.
4. Check all final details with caterer, florist, musicians, etc.
Sleep, sleep, sleep-you
have the biggest day of your life ahead of you. You want to look
and feel your best. Make sure to make time with family, especially
parents to share memories of times gone by and to say thank you
take photos of your last hours at home as a single person. Take
some time for yourself to be quiet. Close your eyes and visualize
every step of the coming day. This will relax you and help prevent
unforeseen incidents.
Have a small meal before leaving for the church don’t bring too many personal items to the church..less to worry about MOST IMPORTANT!!!! Stay Calm...if you run behind schedule-take a deep breath and remember that the ceremony will wait for you!!! Your family and friends want to see you shine-not be frazzled because you are running late-so relax -looking, feeling and radiating your happiness is what counts.
2 hours till "I Do"... Groom, bestman and groomsmenget together begin dressing.
45 minutes... ushers arrive at the wedding sight, pick up boutonnieres and programs, go over seating plans, wait at the entrance to the church for the guests to arrive.
30 minutes... organ or some type of music begins,final check of marriage license, mother and attendants leave for the wedding site, ushers seating guests.
20 minutes... groom and best man arrive, father (or brides escort) and bride leave for the ceremony site.
10 minutes... bridal party and parents wait in the back of church while other relatives are seated.
5 minutes... mother of the groom is escorted to her seat (unless a Jewish ceremony) with grooms father walking right behind the usher, then taking his seat beside his wife...mother of the groom in the pew first with the father sitting on the aisle, bride and father arrive at ceremony site, mother of the bride is escorted down the aisle.
* 1 minute... if there is an aisle runner, two ushers walk in step to the front of the church and unroll the runner and walk in step to the back of the church, unrolling runner as they go... they then take their place in the procession. And now the moment you have waited for......the minister, priest or rabbi takes his/her place along with the groom and best man. (In Christian tradition, the groom and best man enter from chancel door and stand facing the congregation-at an angle-the groom standing nearest the minister, the best man one step behind the groom. In Jewish tradition, the groom and best man are part of the wedding procession. As the ceremony begins, the guests will rise to watch the bride make her entrance.
Getting married can be an exciting and overwhelming time. While your bride is busy with all the fine details of planning the wedding you should be prepared for your responsibilities...
1. Buy an engagement ring.
2. Draw up wedding guest list and have your family make out theirs.
3. Choose and invite your best man and ushers in the wedding.
4. Choose formal wear with your bride to select outfits for you
and ushers.
5. Choose gifts for ushers to be given out at the rehearsal dinner.
6. Choose your brides wedding present, something personal like
jewelry or lingerie.
7. Select a wedding ring with the bride. This should be engraved
on the inside with both of your initials and the date. A personal
message is always special.
8. Plan the honeymoon several months before the big day to ensure
reservations.
9. Traditionally the groom pays for the brides bouquet, corsages,
and boutonnieres.
10. Apply for the marriage license several weeks before and give
it to the best man the day of the wedding.
11. Check to be sure you and the bride have all the necessary
papers, birth certificates, blood test, baptismal certificates,
etc.
12. Make insurance provisions for your new status.
13. Notify your attendants of time and place for rehearsal.
14. Provide the clergyman's fee, which is given to the bestman
to hold on the wedding day.
15. Send a thank-you telegram to your brides parents the next
day saying how lovely the event was.
Somewhere along the
line it happened: Your honey went from being your honey to being
THE honey of all honeys. A ring starts to weigh on your mind.
But before you toss out all your little black books and get down
on bended knee, you have to get a *ring*. Creative types might
think they can get away with the ring from the Cracker Jack box,
but we can't guarantee an enthusiastic "yes" from your
desired spouse-to-be. Most likely, she'll be looking for something
brilliant (but not necessarily, keep reading to the end) -- a
diamond.
Blame it on the Archduke Maximilian of Austria, who started the diamond engagement ring trend way back in 1477 when he presented one to his beloved, Mary of Burgundy. Ever since then, men have been saving up to buy one. Although we're sure there are a few savvy women out there saving up for a man's engagement ring, or even thrifty brides-to-be who are chipping in for their own! Anyway, although two month's salary is a good guideline to use in determining how much to spend, it's a very personal choice and, after all, love tends to blur one's guidelines a bit anyway.
There are six basic shapes to consider when diamond shopping: oval, round, marquise, emerald, pear-shaped, and heart-shaped. Most important, however, is the quality of the stone, and to determine quality you must understand the 4 C's, which are as follows.
F1 = Flawless
IF = Internally Flawless -- minor surface blemishes
VVS1-VVS2 = very, very small inclusions
VS1-VS2 = very small inclusions
SI1-SI2 = small inclusions
I1-I2-I3 = Imperfect -- inclusions visible to the eye Slight inclusions, although they reduce the value of a diamond, do not take anything away from its beauty
Color: This is another aspect where scarcity determines value. Colorless diamonds are extremely scarce in nature. Gradations from high white to beginning yellows are not easily perceptible to an unpracticed eye. The exceptions to high value equaling colorless stones lie in the bright-colored diamonds, i.e., amber, red, blue, etc. These diamonds, in the larger sizes, command enormous prices and are quickly snatched up by collectors worldwide.
Cut: Today the art of diamond cutting has been refined to precise mathematical formulae. Most diamonds are cut with 58 facets. A good cut is determined by the stone's light-reflecting properties and its light dispersion. The cut you finally choose, however, is a matter of personal taste.
Your sweetie's not the diamond type? Why not consider a different gemstone? Although colored gemstone engagement and wedding rings are unusual in the U.S. today, they are the traditional choice for wedding and engagement jewelry for the royal families of Europe: Princess Diana and Sarah Ferguson both received colored- gemstone engagement rings. Rubies, sapphires, and emeralds have been treasured for thousands of years, longer than any other gemstones. This venerable tradition has been revived and is now the strongest new trend in bridal jewelry. A growing number of famous women today -- including Ivana Trump, Kirstie Alley, and Jane Fonda -- wore engagement rings featuring colored gemstones instead of diamonds. Sapphire is the most popular choice for a colored gemstone engagement ring, followed by ruby and emerald.
Sincerity: Sapphire
A gift of this gem says you're not just kidding around.
Electricity: Tourmaline
Squeeze this gem and it gives off electricity. Give it and create sparks.
Passion: Ruby
The ancients believed this gem contained an unquenchable fire.
Marital Harmony: Aquamarine
Say you're sorry, give her this gem and promise that it will never, ever, happen again.
Fertility: Emerald
This gemstone may not help create quintuplets, but twins aren't out of the question.
Love: Emerald
The gem of Venus says love lot more persuasively than a dozen roses.
Hope: Opal
Show your faith that things will work out.
Now all you have to do is figure out her ring size...
The
Lastest in Tuxedos and FormalwearFor the groom, picking out what to wear is easy, right? Well, not quite. There are many styles of formal wear for men. The time of day your wedding is held, how formal the wedding is, and what your bride is wearing all help determine what you need to be wearing. If you’re having a formal evening wedding then you could wear a white tie and tails or a standard tuxedo. For afternoon formal weddings there are cutaway coats (morning coats) and strollers. Make sure that whatever you choose fits the mood and season of your wedding.
Bow ties and ascots are the two most popular choices of neckwear, through regular neck ties are sometimes appropriate. Because the pattern you choose will also appear on your cummerbund, pick something that will look good around your neck and your waist! Remember that the pleats on cummerbunds always face upward. If you don’t like cummerbunds you may decide to wear a vest. Your vest and bow tie don’t have to match exactly, but do be sure they don’t clash. Tuxedo shirts usually are pleated but you can decide what type of collar looks best on you. Your shirt sleeves should hang one-half to 1 inch out of your jacket. French cuff sleeves are popular among many men.
Traditionally, black patent leather oxfords or pumps are worn by the groom. This is your big day, so make sure that your socks match each other and your shoes!
If you want preserve the romance in your honeymoon, make sure your honeymoon planning is practical, realistic and a little street-smart. Here are a few guidelines to get you off to a good start.
Start as early as you can. Last minute honeymoon plans lead to miserable honeymoon experiences.
Find a specialist. Honeymoons are not the same as business travel. The nice folks who helped you line up hotel and flight reservations for your boss's business conference won't be much help, despite their best intentions. Find someone who will sit down with you in person for at least an hour to gather important information about you and discuss your options in meaningful detail.
Clarify what you want to do on your honeymoon (besides the obvious!) so it's easier to identify a suitable location. In between the extremes of catatonic beach reptiles and die-hard mountain climbers lies a multitude of choices -- shopping, sight-seeing, fine dining, aquatic sports, etc. The best honeymoon specialists begin by having husband and wife each fill out a questionnaire. News flash -- you and your spouse-to-be might have different ideas on what constitutes a "great" honeymoon.
Be realistic about what you are prepared to spend. That way, your travel agent doesn't waste time with packages that are unsuitable to your budget. While you're at it, ask your travel agent about setting up a honeymoon registry. That way, it's easy for friends and relatives to contribute to your honeymoon budget (and reduce your inventory of surplus kitchen appliances!).
Know your destination. This is especially true if you plan to travel -- or hold your marriage ceremony -- outside the United States. Every country has its own rules, its own government, its own bureaucratic idiosyncracies -- you get the idea. Your experienced honeymoon specialist should be all over this stuff like a magnet, knowing what offices to contact, what forms to fill out, what permissions to obtain, etc.
Make lists. (If you're not a "list person," jump into a phone booth and transform yourself immediately!) Bring those lists when you visit your honeymoon specialist so you can write new things down right then and there. With the myriad of details you'll have to manage, lists will not only reduce the risk of forgetting something important, they'll boost your morale as you triumphantly check off item after item.
Consider the pros and cons of travel packages. If you're both adventurous and experienced, they may limit your options. Otherwise, they can solve the problem of keeping yourself fed and beveraged, reducing the risk of confronting a five-dollar soda pop when you only have three dollars left.
Get smart advice about spending money. ATM's are convenient, but are they reliable at your location? Traveller's checks are convenient, as long as using them isn't a hassle. Money conversion storefronts are convenient, but might be a rip-off. While you're at it, find out the conversion rate for whatever foreign currency you will need.
Include one or two changes of clothing (especially underwear and socks!) in your carry-on luggage. Believe it or not, airlines have been known to misroute or lose luggage.
Invest in a document holder
that will work with your carry-on luggage. The best honeymoon
specialists provide them. Fumbling for paperwork when you're standing
in line facing an impatient bureaucrat is a miserable experience.
When you are the parent of the groom you're sometimes left out of most of the major decisions made regarding the wedding. The role of the grooms parents traditionally has been to support the groom and the bride's parents by planning around the bride's decisions. Traditionally the grooms parents are responsible for some of the financial responsibilities. Today more and more parents are taking on a more involved and active role in this area. Below are some guidelines to keep in mind when you find yourself about to become an in-law.
The parents of the groom should make an effort to meet the bride's family before the engagement is officially announced. Send a note to the bride welcoming her into your family as well as a note the the bride's mother expressing happiness about the couples engagement.
It's recommended to establish who is paying for what early in the planning process. Tradition tells us that the groom's family expenses are compiled from their wedding attire, travel expenses, rehersal dinner, lodging, and the couple's gift. As tradition meets with modern times more and more financially able families of the groom are contributing to additional cost of the wedding such as flowers, beverages, or splitting the cost for the reception dinner. This is more common when the number of guest continues to grow past the couples budget.
It is extremely helpful to the bride and those involved in the planning process when you compile your guest list promptly and completely. Traditionally the bride or her mother will keep you updated as to responces or wedding gifts received from your family or friends If the father of the groom is also the best man, he should arrange to be fitted for his formalwear as soon as the bride and groom have decided on the style and fashion for the men in the wedding party.
When planning the rehersal dinner remember that each member of the wedding party should be included along with their spouses. It is also recommended to invite grand parents and out of town guest if space permits it.
Traditionally the grooms mother is escorted and seated before the bride's mother and sits in the first pew on the right side of the aisle. If her husband in not part of the wedding party he sits in the same pew.
At the end of the ceremony
or during the reception the grooms parents may be asked to participate
in the formal receiving line with the bride's parents.
Countdown to "I Do"
Moment by moment as the day unfoldes...
The night before...sleep, sleep, sleep-you have the biggest day of your life ahead of you. You want to look and feel your best. Make sure to make time with family, especially parents to share memories of times gone by and to say thank you take photos of your last hours at home as a single person. Take some time for yourself to be quiet. Close your eyes and visualize every step of the coming day. This will relax you and help prevent unforeseen incidents.
The morning of.have a small meal before leaving for the church don’t bring too many personal items to the church..less to worry about MOST IMPORTANT!!!! Stay Calm...if you run behind schedule-take a deep breath and remember that the ceremony will wait for you!!! Your family and friends want to see you shine-not be frazzled because you are running late-so relax -looking, feeling and radiating your happiness is what counts.
2 hours till "I Do"... Groom, bestman and groomsmenget together begin dressing.
45 minutes... ushers arrive at the wedding sight, pick up boutonnieres and programs, go over seating plans, wait at the entrance to the church for the guests to arrive.
30 minutes... organ or some type of music begins,final check of marriage license, mother and attendants leave for the wedding site, ushers seating guests.
20 minutes... groom and best man arrive, father (or brides escort) and bride leave for the ceremony site.
10 minutes... bridal party and parents wait in the back of church while other relatives are seated.
5 minutes... mother of the groom is escorted to her seat (unless a Jewish ceremony) with grooms father walking right behind the usher, then taking his seat beside his wife...mother of the groom in the pew first with the father sitting on the aisle, bride and father arrive at ceremony site, mother of the bride is escorted down the aisle.
* 1 minute... if there is an aisle runner, two ushers walk in step to the front of the church and unroll the runner and walk in step to the back of the church, unrolling runner as they go... they then take their place in the procession. And now the moment you have waited for......the minister, priest or rabbi takes his/her place along with the groom and best man. (In Christian tradition, the groom and best man enter from chancel door and stand facing the congregation-at an angle-the groom standing nearest the minister, the best man one step behind the groom. In Jewish tradition, the groom and best man are part of the wedding procession. As the ceremony begins, the guests will rise to watch the bride make her entrance.
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